In a town as small as Schitt’s cove, the dating group is more like a dating bathtub. With few options and even less privacy, one has to wonder how love and romance can flourish in a place where everyone knows everyone’s business and where the strangest characters reside.
However, if there’s one thing the Emmy-winning series has taught viewers, it’s that love, among other things, has the potential to thrive in the least likely places. In honor of the most romantic month of the year, here’s a deep dive into the dating profiles of the show’s male set of characters to see who would make the audience slide left or right.
The best thing about Jake is that he goes through life carefree, which also happens to be the worst thing about him. When she starts dating David and Stevie simultaneously, things get complicated between the trio.
While it’s great that you are comfortable with your sexuality, it just assumes both parties are comfortable with the arrangement. In general, Jake is quite oblivious when it comes to other people, and based on his nonchalant attitude, it’s easy to assume that he breaks hearts without even knowing it.
While he was only around for a few episodes, Emir made a lasting impression and for all the wrong reasons. When the travel blogger caught Stevie’s attention, she was the happiest fans had ever seen the otherwise reserved hotel receptionist, and it looked like she might have finally found her match.
But when the seemingly sweet Emir breaks things, he shows his true colors. Of course, no one should be in a relationship because they feel pressure, but the way she’s so distant about Stevie’s pain is a huge red flag.
While he’s a dedicated and loyal husband to Jocelyn, it’s hard to imagine that the mayor of Schitt’s Creek would make a great date. On the one hand, he shares too much, which generates some epic doses of shudder every time he opens his mouth.
He is the very definition of “TMI”, he has some questionable habits and lacks self-awareness. However, in the end, Roland has a big heart, but he is definitely a better friend than a partner.
He lives life on his own terms, which is great, but that doesn’t exactly make for the best partner material. Alexis found out the hard way when her crush on Mutt took a serious turn and the two began dating. It didn’t take long for the pair to go their separate ways and for fans, it wasn’t a huge surprise.
He’ll be great company on a cross-country road trip or a trusted companion on a hike, but in the long run, he’s just not reliable. Mutt is a free spirit, who thrives on being independent and unattached and there is no denying that he is better off alone.
Ray Butani is a true Renaissance man. He is a real estate agent, photographer, travel agent, and owner, among other things. He does it all with a smile and a genuine sense of optimism which is a rare find in the dating group.
Yet among all his passions and business adventures, one has to wonder if Ray’s limited availability would pose a threat to his love life. Yes, it would be great to see him have a romantic relationship, but only if he masters work-life balance sooner or finds someone who can match his drive and is just as hardworking as he is.
Bob is a sensitive soul, his smile can light up a room and if it seems like it may be too good to be true, that’s because it is. After his loving wife, Gwen abruptly leaves him, he stays behind to pick up the pieces and start over. Your heart belongs to your spouse and one could see you having a difficult time trying to get over your separation.
The mechanic and garage owner deserves all the happiness in the world, but it takes a great deal of time to heal his wounds before putting his heart back on the market.
Beneath his designer clothing and extensive skincare regimen, David’s heart is pure and beats to the beat of his own drum. He’s one of a kind and when the going gets tough, he’s not afraid to turn tart lemons into locally sourced, high-end sparkling lemonade.
Between the remodeling of The Blouse Barn and the opening of the Rose Apothecary, David is truly a visionary. Even though he is very demanding, he knows what he wants and it is not about playing games or wasting time, something to appreciate in the digital age of dating.
While we can’t imagine it with anyone other than Moira, one can’t help but acknowledge that Johnny Rose is 100% dating material. She has undeniable class, poise and style, and she will travel to the ends of the Earth to support her loved ones.
Like his sons, David and Alexis, Johnny is an entrepreneur and is on the lookout for the award no matter what gets in his way. Sure, he’s not the best gift giver, but his heart is always in the right place and he shows that it’s always the thought that counts.
If there is one thing Schitt’s Fans know, is that Patrick is the king of great romantic gestures. She melted hearts when she sang an original arrangement of the Tina Turner classic “Simply the Best” And he made everyone swoon when he proposed to David not with one, but with four of his unique sterling silver rings.
On paper, it’s perfect, but it falls a bit short in the honesty department (like when he didn’t mention that he was once engaged), but it’s always done for protection. With one more touch of honesty, it has the potential to be the perfect catch.
He loves animals, is good with parents, and has a sense of adventure. Yes, Schitt’s Creek vet Ted could be the perfect companion. First of all, she loves Alexis for who she is and never tries to change her. Second, you are willing to do anything to make a relationship work, including long-distance travel and back-and-forth travel.
In the greatest selfless act of all, he tells Alexis to follow his dreams to New York, even if it means the end of their future together. One can expect that in a hypothetical Stream universe that the couple is back together and makes it work regardless of their location. Whether he’s in a relationship or not, Ted is the kind of partner everyone should be fighting for.
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