Trump fans were outraged and Trump haters were ecstatic over the weekend after Donald Trump claimed on Saturday that he expects to be arrested on Tuesday. But Jimmy Kimmel isn’t sure if he buys it.
“You never know with this guy,” Kimmel joked. “Either he’s about to actually be arrested, or he’s releasing another round of digital trading cards for us to buy.”
In case you slept under a rock this weekend, on Saturday Trump posted a wild, all caps rant on his Twitter clone, Truth Social, saying in part, “NOW ILLEGAL LEAKS FROM A CORRUPT & HIGHLY POLITICAL MANHATTAN DISTRICT ATTORNEYS OFFICE… INDICATE THAT… THE FAR & AWAY LEADING REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE & FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, WILL BE ARRESTED ON TUESDAY OF NEXT WEEK. PROTEST, TAKE OUR NATION BACK!”
The Manhattan District Attorney’s office has not confirmed whether such as arrest is planned. Which is to say, as we write this, it’s not clear if it will even happen. Which brings us back to Kimmel.
“Today is, you probably know, the first official day of Spring. Can you feel it? The days are getting longer. Indictments are in the air. It’s really imaginable. It’s the calm before the Stormy,” Kimmel said, referring to Stormy Daniels, Trump’s former mistress who paid hush money to in 2016.
“You know what, we’ve been saying for years that one of these days we’re gonna wake up and Trump will have been arrested for one of these many crimes? Well, that day could be tomorrow. And how do we know that day could be tomorrow? We know that because, on Saturday, Trump, in what seemed to be an effort to rally the troops to protect him, wrote, ‘The far & away leading Republican candidate & former president of the United States of America, will be arrested on Tuesday of next week. Protest, take our nation back!’” Kimmel continued.
“Well we already did take it back. From you. Now go away,” Kimmel cracked. “I don’t know. You never know with him. Either he’s about to actually be arrested, or he’s releasing another round of digital trading cards for us to buy. We don’t know for sure.”
“But he went totally Truth Postal this weekend,” Kimmel added. “He said America is a dying third world country. He said the election was stollen—he spelled it with two L’s—he called for protests, he said they should investigate the investigators, he suggested the NYPD should refuse to arrest him. Let’s just say he was very Presidential.”
“He’s absolutely spinning out. Because he knows it’s Melania’s birthday from her next month and she might finally get her wish from her,” Kimmel said.
Kimmel went on to talk about how other Republicans have reacted to Trump’s comments, including House Speaker Kevin McCarthy, who denied the literal meaning of the words Trump used. He also mocked former Vice President Mike Pence, who when asked about it offered up a very strange, empty platitude: “No one is above the law. But no one is beneath it, either.”
“Has somebody been gnawing on mother’s scented candles again? Because that doesn’t make any sense at all,” Kimmel joked.
Kimmel went on to list all of the reasons Trump has been in trouble, concluding, “he is the dumbest criminal in the world.” Watch the whole monologue above.